Being Film #22 for Hooptober 2023
Man, Ken Russell is naughty, huh? I mean, yeah…I knew this in theory have seen The Devils, but maybe his predilection for the excesses of every appetite was maybe limited to the type of story being told? Uh, no, and that’s a good thing. The Lair of the White Worm, his adaptation of Bran Stoker’s other vampiric narrative, is so high camp, so over the top in its execution it’s a black comedic horrific delight. I found myself laughing throughout, which I firmly believe was his intent.
THE QUICK SUMMARY: Mary and Eve run the small bed and breakfast in Derbyshire every since their parents mysteriously disappeared. Scottish archeologist Angus Flint digs up the ancient skull something while excavating their yard, and before long the legend of the D’Ampton Worm becomes much more than a legend when the exotic Lady Sylvia returns to her manor with some major kinks and fetishes. Can Angus and James D’Ampton, the new lord and descendent of the knight who slew the original beast stop the murders and sacrifices before succumbing to it themselves? Will they want to after being exposed to the sensual delights Lady Sylvia has to offer? And what’s with the borderline pornographic dreams and visions filmed on a VHS tape? All will be revealed!
Russell revels in the garish hysterics he puts to film, and it’s addicting to behold. I remember seeing parts of this when it first came out on VHS and being put off by how cheap it felt and how little it seemed to care for the story. Decades later I get it: that’s kind of the point. Russell has little interest in sticking to convention in his films; he’s much more invested in getting to the pulpy innards of what the story tries to convey. And so with a story steeped in horror, vampires and lust that rails against good Christian values he of course goes off the deep end, ensuring there’s enough to scintillate and outrage, all blown up in great colors and camerawork by Dick Bush, which has to be the greatest name I’ve come across in a while.
The Lair of the White Worm wouldn’t work without a game enough cast, and it is a marvel that we get both Hugh Grant and Peter Capaldi going full hog with Russell’s ideas. You’ve got Hugh Grant bisecting vampires with a massive sword, dressing up in various vaguely military getups even though he’s really just a playboy, and Capaldi goes full Scot, using bagpipes to charm the vampires out of their hiding places. Capaldi’s hair bears mentioning: it is a MARVEL. I haven’t seen hair that floppy since, well…since Hugh Grant in most of his 90s romantic comedies.
How crazy is it that HUGH GRANT has the more normal hair in this film?
Finally there are those incredible dreams and visions. Yeah, be prepared: You’re going to get nuns being raped by Roman soldiers while a crucified Christ is eaten by a monstrous white snake. There are more ceremonial dildoes in this movie that any others I can think of, and then there’s a truly weird but fascinating dream High Grant has where he wanders into a painting that goes from a cave to an airplane to a cavern where I can’t be sure, but I think there were more ceremonial dildoes. There was definitely a snake or two, a wrestling match between stewardesses, and Grant pretending a rem marker was something…else.
Yeah. The Lair of the White Worm. You were a silly delight. Thank you.
Cinema Dual 
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